Pimp My Spacemobile - 11/25/04
The discussion of the Spacemobile-home in PV yesterday got me thinking about it again - it's been a while since it's had a good post. After all, the Spacemobile is the most-often mentioned topic on Paul's Pond, followed closely by the Gordita vs. Chalupa showdown and Seann Verde.

Last spring, Sam and JD tried to sign the Spacemobile up for Pimp My Ride. For anyone not familiar, Pimp My Ride is a show on MTV starring the rapper Xzibit (who JD is in love with) and a slang-inclined entourage of auto mechanics. Basically the premise of the show is they find kids with the shittiest cars possible, and then spend an obscene amount of money "Pimping out" their ride. Like they'll put a hundred thousand dollars into a five hundred dollar '82 DeLorean to put it on 4" rims with a gold paint job, a home theatre system inside and flames shooting out the front. It's a pretty great show.

Anyway, the Spacemobile unfortunately didn't qualify for Pimp My Ride, for two reasons. First of all, I'm too old. Contestants have to be 22 years old or younger. We thought about having our younger friend Josh pretend that it was his car, but he can't drive a stick, and really the last thing I want is an angry Xzibit coming after me for scamming them.

The other reason it didn't qualify is because, believe it or not, the Spacemobile is not shitty enough. Yes, to the defiance of all, the Spacemobile is too good for something. It's missing a hub cap and half the rear bumper, makes a high-pitched whining noise when you go faster than 20, and stalls every time you take your foot off the gas, but it could be much worse. Now that I had the muffler put back on and the cracked windshield replaced after the Roadtrip, physically it's in decent shape. To be on Pimp My Ride, a car basically needs to be held together by duct tape.

This got me thinking though. What with the holiday season approaching, if I could have any alterations done to my trusty aqua steed, what would they be? And, as usual, when I start thinking like this, some pretty infeasible ideas came up.



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