I am now the proud owner of a 4-piece action-stealth-weapon-samurai set. It was only eight dollars at Toys 'R Us. Eight! It's so sweet. "Do you need a gift receipt?" asked the gentlemen behind the checkout corner.
"Nope," I replied. "It's for me."
- First of all, my new samurai set is awesome. Not only does it include a sword and nunchucks, but also two shuriken throwing stars. Two! And the sword lights up and makes a sound when you push a button. That's so cool.
- Second of all, I can't believe how cheap awesome toys are these days. I guess there aren't of eight-year-olds with my kind of disposable income. And by disposable I mean eight extra bucks.
- Third of all, not only do I now have a dope new samurai set, I also have a radical arsenal of accessories for my samurai costume for the Halloween party I'm going to tonight.
- And fourth, there will be drunk people at this party. And drunk people really like to play with bodacious samurai accessories.
- So, fifth, and finally... I expect my awesome new samurai set to last about eight minutes.