Mama and Papa Jury even came in for the house-pillaging challenge, but it turned out to be a joke for the Spacemobile. A desk, recliner, patio set, lounge chairs, bookshelf, dresser, end table, kitchen table, 8 chairs, Skootskate and a huge box of oranges? The Spacemobile laughs at your challenge! I didn’t even have to put anything in shotgun.
Now my garage is full of more cool stuff that I know what to do with. The house is in utter shambles right now, however, which has something to do with no less than 7 ex-fraternity members staying with us this weekend… I’ll explain later. But first I have to rearrange my room and fix the rest of the house before I can even think about finding a place for Grandma’s easy chair.
When I said anything left at my grandmother’s house was going to be taken by Indians, I wasn’t kidding. At about 11:30am the day after I left, six Apache Indians arrived from the reservation where my Aunt and Uncle used to live, with not one not two but three pickup trucks. Apparently they do this from time to time to provide good used furniture for thrift stores on the reservation. Anyway they descended on the house like locusts. In four hours the place was stripped cleaner than a turkey skeleton after Jury Thanksgiving. They took the curtains. They took the curtain rods. They took the goddamn outlet covers. Those Indians don’t fool around when it comes to getting’ free shit. I admire them deeply.